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Hello all! I already have a question! =)

D

darkdrift

Guest
Hi, I am wondering if anyone could proof read my letter to invite affiliates to join with me. I was trying to get across the point that I care about my affiliates and will work towards there success, because it is a mutual gain, and they keep 75% ...so here it is
"Hello Everyone,

I would like to introduce myself, Chris Morrison- CEO of www.thesurveymasters.com . Our site has been up for 6 months now and going STRONG. We would like to invite new, and vetran affiliates to join us in the money making process using clickbank.

Okay now lets get to why the heck you ( the most important person in the whole scheme of things, should affiliate with us)

We have an affiliate program for mine that pays you 75% ( the highest amount clickbank allows) and you will reach your goals of most $/day because we charge the members $49 each.

I'm sure you have been contacted by a lot more people than just me about becoming there affiliates, but I have a few reasons why you should please consider becoming our affiliate and promoting us on your website.

1) I'm always online, friendly, devoted to affiliate success, and am always thinking of new ideas.
2) We stand behind our product and service ( we help people make money online using online surveys )
3) We convert at 15-30%, which is better than 99% of the thousands of programs out there. The reasons why we convert better ( meaning more sales revenue for you are as follows
* We are the ONLY website to have LIVE CHAT for the members and people curious about purchasing, so that way they are more likely to buy because they are talking with a real person instead of reading a website and just buying on the spot without talking to anyone
* We offer them an INSTANT $25 offer back to them when they purchase, so they only pay around $25, but you still get the full 75% of $49!!
* We actually have a good product that has information that makes them money, and lots of it and we guide them through the process, so this means to you that LESS refunds, so you keep more money!

Please consider us as an affiliate with you, I can guide you through what txt link to use that will get you highest click through rate, and how to 'pre-sale' them so you get more money, I will work with you directly to surpass your goal of whatever amount you have in mind.

If you have ANY questions at all I would love to answer them, please either email me at joincontact@thesurveymasters.com or contact me on AIM if you have it at MetalTastesFunny

If you want to check out our affiliate site now it is http://www.thesurveymasters.com/affiliates.htm

Once again, thank you for reading and have a great day!

Chris Morrison
CEO TheSurveyMasters.com"
 
Hi Chris,

Welcome to 5 Star. Thanks for sharing your program info with us. I skimmed your letter and it looks like you did a good job.
 
Welcome...

I will say upfront ... I'm not a politically correct king of person...

I am more of the beat you with a club up in your face kind of guy...

so without further fuss...

We have an affiliate program for mine that pays you 75% ( the highest amount clickbank allows) and you will reach your goals of most $/day because we charge the members $49 each.

poor grammar and confusing

I'm sure you have been contacted by a lot more people than just me about becoming there affiliates, but I have a few reasons why you should please consider becoming our affiliate and promoting us on your website.

* We are the ONLY website to have LIVE CHAT for the members and people curious about purchasing, so that way they are more likely to buy because they are talking with a real person instead of reading a website and just buying on the spot without talking to anyone

a deal breaker for most astute affiliates - you need to asure that we are going to be paid for our sales and how that is tracked... especially with LiveChat on yoursite

* We actually have a good product that has information that makes them money, and lots of it and we guide them through the process, so this means to you that LESS refunds, so you keep more money!

confusing grammar

Please consider us as an affiliate with you, I can guide you through what txt link to use that will get you highest click through rate, and how to 'pre-sale' them so you get more money, I will work with you directly to surpass your goal of whatever amount you have in mind.

more confusing grammar

Now that you have been bludgened... I feel much better :D

and hopefully your learned something.. useful!

Is english your first language?

Joe
 
Yes, english is my first language....OUCH...

In my defence- :) -

1) it was 3am in the morning when i wrote this
2) I didn't edit it at all yet, OR read it, just wrote it and clicked go!
3) I pasted half of it from another letter i personally wrote to someone else, so that might explain some 'ackwardness'


But anyways, thanks for being blunt, sometimes its the best way, now let me go about fixing this 'bloody mess' haha.
 
I can afford to be nice and diplomatic, cuz I know Joe will always come to tell it like it is! :p He made some good points.

You know I can't proof my own copy even when I try. I knew EXACTLY what I meant to say therefore I can't see my mistakes.
 
well see, you learned something today...

#1 rule of marketing... never, never submit anything you created when you should be sleepin :D

I personally know the message you wantedto convey... but I'm not your average target affiliate...

I'm sure you already know this... your first impression may be your only impression..

best of success with you program..

JOe
 
Ouch!

Professionalism Wins everytime!

Even though Joe's comments kinda scratched it was true. I've learned to never write anything for my company when I'm drained and need to sleep. ;)
You were brave to share this with us and for that I respect you very much. :) learning is an on- going process and we've all encountered the same road blocks.
 
MI
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