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How Can I Improve This Copy

Discussion in 'Copywriting' started by LoveConversions, Apr 30, 2016.

  1. LoveConversions

    LoveConversions Affiliate affiliate

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    Any advice on making this copy better would be greatly appreciated! Have a great day folks!
     
  2. John Scott

    John Scott Affiliate affiliate

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    It just seems spammy and salesy from the word go.

    Any time you are selling cheap links, you put yourself in that category that really lacks trust. Whored out websites have no trust, do not pass link juice, and SEO's know it.

    So instead of "insane" you might want to go with "editorial integrity."
     
  3. Patch

    Patch Affiliate affiliate

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    To start -> "Well we've have".

    John is spot on as well.

    Same ol' same ol' stuff.

    What is the copy for --> PR / Email / Blog / Print?

    Who is your target --> New / Inter / Pro?

    All "very" determinant factors when seducing your readers.


    Either way, I'd have someone do a "re-write" that has a better grasp on persuasive sales copy as well as an understanding of grammatical structures.

    Personally, I'd do 3/4/5/6 variations and run a split test.


    No offense meant. ;)

    #Patch


    EDIT: But hey, what do I know! It's late, I'm tired and been working and reading all day..!
     
    John Scott likes this.

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